10 Stupid Things I’ve Said or Done

Based on the success of our list posts here and here, we’ve decided to periodically feature top 10 lists to inspire and entertain you. For example, this TIT will inspire you not to be stupid and make you laugh at how stupid I am. Please note, although the list is numbered, I have not ranked my stupidisms in hierarchical order.

  1. “It’s called a labtop because it was created in a lab. Laptop doesn’t make sense.”
  2. “What color is the clear Sprite?”
  3. Science was not a strong subject for me. I consistently passed, but I never excelled. My teacher once asked the class, “when does fog occur?” He then chose a random student to call on. I am always the random student. My answer, “the morning.” Correct answer: summer.
  4. When I wrote “stupid” I actually spelled it “stuped” at first.
  5. “Do you remember that show Ghostwriter where there was that invisible thing that gave people clues?”  My friend replied, “You mean the ghost.”
  6. My younger sister had an ant invasion in her room. I created an alter-ego for myself called The Ant Warrior. I spoke in a manner similar to voice-overs in old time movies and dramatically massacred the ants. Sadly, this was only a few years ago.

    The Ant Warrior aka the most embarrassing, unattractive picture I will ever post.

  7. “They do have thong Spanx. They’re called Thanx.”
  8. I made up an entire worship complex in college. Our class was supposed to visit either a Buddhist or Hindu temple (I never went). Our instructor went around the room asking each individual student about his visit. I couldn’t stop lying and giving more ridiculous details. What…an idiot.
  9. “We can’t all be porn-star romance novelists.”
  10. Yesterday at Target, I saw a re-usable water bottle that read “Hydrate Responsibly.” I said, “This is so dumb. Who would hydrate irresponsibly and drink vodka all day instead of water?” Magnus responded, “I think they mean save the environment and reduce waste.”

9 Responses to 10 Stupid Things I’ve Said or Done

  1. bethro says:

    My favorite part is the photo because I am always posting ridiculous pictures and it makes me feel socially accepted to see the ant warrior.

    Also, the ant warrior looks like a badass. I wouldn’t mess with her.

  2. bethro says:

    So I’m looking at the ant warrior again and wondering about the galoshes. I’ve had ants and I’m not sure rain boots would be much help.

  3. Courtney says:

    Why does the ant warrior have rolled up pants? Wouldn’t you want your legs covered? The ghostwriter one was my fav.

  4. MM Mim says:

    Many people who made up ridiculous-seeming worship schemes went on to be popes and other supreme rulers of the unsuspecting and basically good faithful so you are in good (at least common) company.

  5. Ahhh, the Ant Warrior. I remember when you sent me that photo and swore me to secrecy. I really did LOL then. 🙂

  6. Lindsay says:

    I love the Ant Warrior. You so sexy baby, partly because you look like ME! : )

    Here’s something stupid I said: “She works the graveyard shift? Man, there’s gotta be a better job out there for her than that!”

  7. […] are enjoying umbrella drinks on the beach while I remain in the Americas sharing my embarrassing, foolish moments with the world. She’ll be back next […]

  8. Catie says:

    Ah yes, the Ant Warrior. I remember her. And that you swore me to secrecy when you sent me the pic.

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