…regarding New Year’s Eve

Around midnight this December 31st, while care-free 20-somethings bar hop in low-cut glittery dresses and high heels, I will be home sleeping. Or, more likely, I will be breast feeding a baby back to sleep.

So I guess my New Year’s will have something in common with those youngsters: boobies.

You are probably thinking that this juxtaposition means I am mourning my lost youth, my baby-free days. You are wrong. Since a very young age, my New Year’s Eves have been distinctly lacking clubs, excess booze, and promiscuous behavior. While not marked by reading of the Bible, you couldn’t argue that my year-end evenings are contestants for a new “Beths Gone Wild” series of videos marketed to insomniacs and pervs. New Year’s Eve has always been a good time, non-traditional though it may be.

A few of these sober, often house-bound evenings stick in my head as particularly fun.

Circa 1989 – My younger brother and I set up our racing cars in my room and brought in the little black and white TV. We watched whatever old movies were on and raced our cars around and around. I don’t remember if we made it to midnight. I also don’t remember who won more races, but I suspect it was I.


Remember these?

1998 – My parents took my brother and me to Disney World for New Year’s. Yes, I was 19 and could be considered too old for Disney World. Yes, it was a blast. The highlight: The lines for even the best rides grew small as the clock ticked closer to midnight.

1999 – My best friend had a very small child, so she and I and a couple of other friends (including my now-husband) watched the ball drop at her place and waited for all the missiles to launch when Y2K hit.  They didn’t. That was pretty good, when you think about it.

Circa 2006 – We went to a beer tasting with the husband’s sister and her boyfriend. The closest I ever came to a traditional New Year’s Eve.

2008 – I made pretzels and bought a six pack of hoppy West Coast IPA. The husband and I played Mario Kart on the Wii with his sister and her husband across the country. They were on East Coast time, we were on West Coast time. I liked that set up because at 9 I could say I had celebrated the New Year and go to bed.

This is what my pretzels look like.

I understand if this year, when you are humping a stranger to some terrible top 40 song at a club, you think of this list and feel a surge of envy.

Curmudgeonly yours,



4 Responses to …regarding New Year’s Eve

  1. People already think of you when humping strangers, so doing it on NYE won’t be a stretch.

  2. JR says:

    I think it should say “On New Year’s Eve.”

    Also, I only probably lost because I went to fast and my cards flew off the track. If that’s losing, baby, I don’t want to win.

    I remember the Star Wars ride was new and we had waited forever earlier in the day to get on. Then from like 11:40 to 12:00 we got on it 3 times.

    • bethro says:

      I also remember the lady who you swore was trying to get herself dancing with you in a picture. I still think it was just crowded.

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