Alt Title: Misconceptions and Confusions about Alejandro
Here’s the thing. I thought Alejandro was “hung like Mexico” and I was greatly grossed out because 1), TMI, Gaga and 2) Did that mean he was misshapen? Like maybe his you-know-what was all bumpy and surrounded by the ocean?
But then I looked up the lyrics because Ashley (co-blogger and much-more-knower-of-pop-music-than-Beth) expressed confusion when I postulated this theory. I discovered he is “HOT like Mexico.”
Instead of being relieved, I was disappointed. I went from being grossed out by Lady Gaga to annoyed that she was so cliche. And also untruthful, since I doubt he averages a body temperature of 78 degrees Fahrenheit in May (source: weather.uk). You know why? Because he’d be dead, Lady Gaga. Your lover would be cold and dead.
Or is he not her lover? I feel this is vague in the song. I had only ever heard the song in the gym. Listening to music at the gym does not always yield a proper understanding of the song, as the hung/hot debacle clearly showed. When I looked up the lyrics, I thought I would learn a lot.
Who are these other guys? Who is the girl she is singing about? Herself? Some other titled Lady? And where did she get her title? Is she from an old English family? Did she do some service to the queen?
The moral of the story is this: don’t look to pop music for answers. It only raises more questions. Also, you probably shouldn’t get involved with Lady Gaga.